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" Acceptance "Part 3 in the "War Torn arc"Written By: ShenLong Disclaimer: I don't own
the G Boys. They belong to their respective copyright companies. I
just borrow them from time to time to play with and return them a
lot happier. Ne? :) Also I don't own the song "Diamonds"
It's from the c.d. "Then Again..." and belongs to John Farnham
and as such all rights are his. Rating: PG. Warnings: Shonen-ai, sap,
angst, POV, Song fic. Notes: Duo confronts Heero
as to why he sought him out after all this time. Authors Notes: This is the
Sequel to "When All Else Fails" and is the third in what
I have dubbed my 'War Torn Arc'. All the songs that this series will
feature and be based upon can be found on the "Then Again....."
c.d. by John Farnham. Reading through the lyrics I found that many
of the songs can be related back to the Gundam boys and so the idea
for this song arc was born. I hope you enjoy them all. Archive: www.gundam-wing-diaries.150m.com // Denotes song lyrics
//
" Acceptance " June 2003 ShenLong
It was late in the evening and the colony lights were dimming. I sat on the balcony of the unit I had shared with Duo since my arrival upon L2 three weeks ago, a drink cradled in my hand as my eyes stared out at nothing in particular, just happy to sit and relax. My attention was caught by the slim figure that stepped out to join me, dropping into the chair that adjoined my own. Silence abounded as we contemplated our thoughts, content with the warmth of company and safe in the peaceful reverie. I raised my coffee mug to my lips and took a mouthful of the warm fluid, the sounds from the street below beginning to permeate my thoughts as I relaxed after a hard day in the scrap yard with Duo. I thought again how lucky I was that he had accepted my arrival without question, somehow knowing I would come to him. He hadn't asked after the circumstances that had caused me to arrive, but I knew it was only a matter of time before he did. I turned to study his profile in the light of the artificial evening and caught my breath. My eyes had graced his face several times but this was the first time I had actually been able to study his features without distraction. The boyish lines were disappearing as manhood found him, the angular planes of his cheekbones becoming more defined, his slightly upturned nose, the dark shadow that graced his jaw indicating the need to shave, those sweet pouting lips that were designed for kissing and his violet eyes that swirled with his emotions. All this beauty was crowned with that shimmering halo of golden chestnut that tumbled around him in a silken waterfall. I loved his hair. Usually braided, it reached to his hips and swung around his lithe body as he moved and worked but when he was home he would let it loose to cascade around him, brushing the tops of his thighs and driving me to distraction. "Heero?" The voice calling my name drew me from my musings and my eyes focussed, meeting questioning violet and I blushed as I realized I had been caught staring. "Hai?" I mumbled, turning away to hide my embarrassment. "Why did you come?" This was the question I had been dreading and yet strange to say, I welcomed it. It needed to be discussed, to be brought out into the open so we could move on with the relationship, at least I hoped there would be a relationship. My brows knitted together in thought as I scanned my mind for the right words to say what needed saying. Never one to use much in the way of a vocabulary at the best of times, I was now floundering as I fought to find the elusive letters to string together and explain the reasons behind my arrival. Duo relaxed back into his seat, granting me all the time I needed to compose myself. He knew I was not big on talking and never had been. I found I could convey all I needed to with simple short sentences, and it was with difficulty that I began my exposition of the reasons behind my actions. I began my story, Duo remaining silent and letting me speak. // I looked there across to the horizon "I had been released from the hospital the very day after you had left and I moved to Relena's to recuperate. I spent many weeks regaining my physical health and re-building my strength. Relena was a friend, an ally but nothing more. I would spend the evenings at the Sanc palace in much the same way I am now, sitting on the balcony and staring at the night sky. The nights on earth are beautiful, the stars form a canopy above you and the moon casts her silvery glow over everything." // I stretched out to touch what I was seeing "I would stare at the night sky for hours, just picking out the various constellations and satellites. Relena worried about me and the time I spent just staring, but how could I tell her what I was searching the heavens for when I didn't know myself? I knew the answers to what I was feeling were held out there in the void but I had no clue as to where I should start to look for them." // There were diamonds on the water "I tried to make things work between Relena and myself. I knew what it was she wanted, but it didn't feel right, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't feel anything more for her than simple friendship. I began to think back, back to the wars and the times we had spent together , not just you and me but all five of us and try to find some clue to explain this feeling of loss in my soul." // I believe that certain things can happen "When the first war ended I was lost. My training had not gone beyond the fighting and so that's why I left. I had to work through the minefield of inner turmoil and discover how to live. I needed to come to terms with the peace. When Relena was kidnapped I easily slipped back into the role I had been trained for as I hadn't yet purged myself of the *schooling*. With her safe again there was once more no need for my skills." // And I have been a witness to survival "I had plenty of time to think while I lay recovering. I thought long and hard about many things, my part in the war, my life then and now, my friends and comrades, and you. For some inexplicable reason my thoughts were always drawn back to you. I knew then that I could never feel anything more for Relena, and so I began to search my soul for what it was I craved." // There were diamonds on the water, "I began to recall all the small instances during our times together, the times we spent in the different schools, the missions we shared and the caring, friendly attitude you always showed me regardless of how I treated you. I began to put things together, it was like a huge jigsaw puzzle and it took me a while to find the pieces... but I did." // Here I am, I'm standing on I took a deep breath as I sought to continue. I quickly scanned your face for some reassurance that you understood what it was I was trying to say. Your face remained soft and passive yet your eyes were a swirl of differing emotions and I knew in your own way you had begun to understand what I was so pathetically trying to convey. // Here I am, my time is coming round You declined to speak, offering instead a smile of encouragement and silence for me to continue. // Now I am in a perfect situation "I spoke with Relena about my restlessness and it was she who finally put me on the right track, handed me the final parts to the puzzle. You see, she knew, she had seen the tenderness which you had shown me while in the hospital, the way your eyes would follow me and watch me while I slept. She could see what I was blind to, and having determined for herself in her own way that she was not what I needed, she tried to give me the clues as to what it was that I searched for." // They steal me back "She was the one that explained what I was feeling, what the dreams I was having meant, why I sat and stared at a certain glimmering dot in the sky with longing in my eyes and heart. She knew I was running from the truth and in her own way she made me see what it was I needed, where it was I should be." Another deep breath passed my lips and I immersed myself in your eyes. "It was then that the final piece fell into place and I faced what I had been hiding from... My emotions." // I saw diamonds on the water "When I stopped and looked at the puzzle now solved I could clearly see the subtle ways you had tried to let me know that you cared and I realized that I needed you. The calling I had tried to reason out with logic could not be explained in that way." // Diamonds on the water "It was then that I decided to leave the earth and find you. I had to know if you still felt the same way, if you still cared enough in your heart to forgive me for my stubbornness, if you were willing to overlook my flaws and give me a chance." I looked up from beneath my bangs, baring my soul through my eyes, willing you to understand what I was saying. You smiled again and reached forwards to cup my cheek, thumb stroking over the bone and I leaned into the caress. "It took you long enough, Yuy." My lids squeezed shut as the tears formed, my breath hitched and I began to tremble. You understood. It was as if the weight of the universe had been lifted from my shoulders and my soul lightened. I felt your arms wrap around my waist, pulling me to a standing position. My own arms found their way around your form and I rested my head against your chest, the tears flowed as you stroked my back, soothing and comforting at the same time. "Does this mean you're willing to forgive me and give this a chance?" I couldn't help the whisper, rejection was the one thing I dreaded. You tilted my head and spoke softly. "There is nothing to forgive." As your lips descended on mine I knew I had made the right decision, I had finally found what I had been looking for.... and it was perfect. ~ Owari ~
On to part 4 in War Torn arc: "Reason" |